Horoscopes
by:
Madam Volkai
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Aries:
My advice is to move the 20 kilos out of your trunk.
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Taurus:
Watch out for someone small. They will soon grow large in your eyes.
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Gemini:
Don't pray: wish.
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Cancer:
Never tell the truth. You'll be better off.
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Leo:
Your perky attitude may lead to your demise.
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Virgo:
Do not conform.
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Libra:
Live in the now - but remember, the day of judgment approacheth.
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Scorpio:
When Aimée says jump, you say "how high."
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Sagittarius:
Life in prison is not as bad as it sounds.
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Capricorn:
Beware of Greeks bearing gifts.
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Aquarius:
Trip & fall, trip & fall, trip, & fall...
Pisces:
Listen to the crap people lay on you. (But
silently
realize that people whine too much).
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