Dear Kurtz,

There are a few things that I would like to say this week while Aimée's away on vacation, some of what is to make fun of her.  First of all, Aimée's not very good at revenge.  For the seven times I rolled her car the only thing that happened to me was once - I repeat, once - I was hit at a dance, but it took me all of 3 minutes to clean it up.  She's lucky she gave up before I got really creative.

Secondly, I would like to apologize to Ed for constantly making fun of him.  He's not really as pathetic as sometimes my comments tend to suggest.  On occasions, like December 10th, groups of people have been known to laugh at what he has said.

I have on final though to today.  In last week's newsletter (*editor's note Vol. 1 Issue 8) the investigative report mentioned Hershey's desire to change the highly accepted tan into blue on M&M's.  Well, Myra, Hershey's does not own M&M's - Mars does (not the planet, Aimée).  So next time please investigate deeper.

Jay Silverman
 
 

Oh Jay, you are in trouble now.  You are so lucky that Lauri ended the reign of my newsletter temporarily.  You though that I wouldn't see what you wrote until it was too late.  Well you were wrong, not any surprise to me, after all I'm always right.  I actually didn't give up on getting your car, I just wanted the suspense to build up for something really big to happen.  And as for the three minutes that it took you to get the suran-wrap off your car, that was because your car was SO incredibly dirty that it wouldn't stick... not something to be really proud of, Jay.  So, I suggest that you look over your shoulder now, knowing that somewhere lurking in the shadows of your house, Aimée's waiting for the perfect time to strike...
 

the editor